The question of toys bothers me. My son is not in daycare/school/whatever you call it, and so the only educational or creative stimulation he gets is what I can give him. We play outside a lot, where I feel like learning will happen with or without fun toys, and we go to playgroups with other kids, but sometimes when I see something cool, I feel the "I want it" desire well up. Good toys teach all kinds of thing -- just think about blocks and musical instruments and sand boxes and water tables and, and, and, that's kind of the problem. There are only 8 bazillion really awesome toys in the world. And at times, I have wanted them all.
There is also the question of time and as a first time mom, this one really gets me. How long will toy X be fun and interesting and cool? Sometimes, it's only for a few months (tummy time mat, anyone?) And when your child finds an interest, you just can't always know if it will be something that lasts. Even when I can ask him, I doubt I'll ever get the right answer to the question of, say, whether or not we should get a piano. So, what do you do? Blow wads of cash on everything he finds exciting and craigslist all the duds?
Well, I am here to talk about the benefits of lazily waiting around. Don’t buy your kid everything. The first rule of thumb is to only buy them stuff you know they will like. Wait until you’ve seen them love it at someone else’s house two or three times; then figure out if you really need your own. Case in point, this cart from Ikea.
Finn loves it and I am not bringing him his very own and he will be ok. Personally, I am tired of having it rammed into my ankles. The second rule of thumb – make friends with your neighbors. And third, let everyone know you have an open door policy to accept anything they want to get rid of.
We don’t know everyone on our block; we don’t have time. But just from the folks living right next to us we have scored countless freebies. We always talk about having everyone over for a party or for dinner or something as a thank you, and it’s never happened; but we still get stuff from them. Sometimes it’s plants for the garden, veggies that will go bad when someone leaves on vacation, that kind of thing. And sometimes, gloriously, it’s toys.
Sandbox: it was old and gross and muddy and they were going to throw it away; we cleaned it up (hosed it down and left it out in the sun to dry) and bought some new sand.
Little Tykes car: they were tired of tripping over it, and they threw in some baseball bats, balls, and buckets. OMG the buckets are a huge hit. That one came out of left field, I was unaware of the wonder of buckets.
One of these things that was a death trap on our driveway. I gave it to another friend. You’ve got to spread the free stuff around.
And we have a small pile of crap that my son has picked out of their goodwill bag, which they keep in the carport and let him rummage through.
The sandbox and the car are two items I desperately wanted to buy for my kid about six months before they showed up in our yard for free. The sandbox, I figured, would be so educational, great for sensory play. The car, well, he just loved it every time we saw it at someone else’s house. I didn’t realize that these two items are everywhere. Everyone has one; no one is going to drive across town to buy one from you for five bucks off craigslist. Likewise, if you’ve ever caught yourself looking at a Bumbo chair in the store Stop Do Not Buy It. Even if you don’t really know anyone with kids, there are so many of those things kicking around the world that you will be able to find one, probably for free. They, like so many other things created for our kids, just hang around and hang around.
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